Writing Samples

I can’t afford to save
by Kevin Dowler

Opening a letter from my bank is a frightening experience.

That is ever since the banks were allowed to continue billing us for their present service charges.

Thanks for the service, but I do prefer to do my own tipping.

Not that banks are secretive about what are commonly called hidden service charges. As soon as I discovered strangely–noted withdrawals from my account and asked a bank teller about them I was quickly handed a small binder explaining the charges.

A month later after finishing the text (and I must say I did enjoy the surprise ending), I was able to decipher most of the service charges on my accounts,, although I was somewhat perturbed to discover that the SCB charge was identified as a charge for the Service Charge Booklet.

I remember when banks enjoyed our patronage by allowing them to use our money, so who’s lending to who these days?

Is the bank performing a service by cashing cheques? After the personality, finger printing, voice printing and picture ID tests are confirmed some banks will even cash a cheque even if you don’t have an account at their branch.

And even if they won’t cash your cheque the girls can still be counted on for a “Have a nice day,” which is soon to be added to the service charge list under the HND title, only a mere 33 cents.

But the thing is after a hundred or so other small service charges, if you were due for any interest this quarter you’ve spent it on service charges any way.

So what do you do, keep your money in a sock?

I’ve tried and it just doesn’t work.

First off, some socks have holes in them and if you use one of a matching pair of socks for your bank it’s hard to remember which one is your long term savings account and which one is expense money.

In my case it was neither since both were relatively empty most of the time.

And try to pay a bill without a chequing account.

The banks really do have us by the ... er ... by the nickels and dimes.

Unless you are able to keep a minimum balance of $500 you are a slave to the service charge swindle of most banks.

Once again it’s the poor paying for the services of the rich.

If you get something done by your bank that you really appreciate you will probably see it on a bill somewhere.

When banking machines were first out the banks made all use of the machines free trying to get us to use the money machines but now they are beginning to send out the bills.

The bank managers say trying to promote people to not use savings accounts as chequing accounts by implementing service charges is for their own good.

Whose own good? . . . is what I want to know.

It sure isn’t my bank book that is being helped out. I either pay for a cheque or a pay for a savings account withdrawal.

So before you decide to crack your kid’s piggy bank and teach him how to use a bank you better decide if the kid has enough to afford a bank account.

These days not everyone can.